my only friend

what does my future
have for a man like me
my lifes' a confusing illusion
of cerebral challenges
but its just a double bind
of the rebellious,
amorphus mass -
of selfish, petty villians
who shake the system
and demand
'i am worthy of power!'
'there are no fears in my heart!'
well, some know better than to tell a lie,
because we have witnessed a death...
i can bury the past
upside down
in its grave to be smited
as a crying clown
i love you Jesus!
but i am too weak to pray
i am not Holy
but a chaste fidelity
i have answers and some wisdom,
confidence in faith
i cherish the love
i will always have
for my only wedded wife
but bless me Father for your sacred heart
i have but one request
please don't take another loved one from me
or i sharn't take another breath.