new year blues

the darker nights are passing me by
the solitude i feel is hurting
like -
- barbed wire, cutting into the pit of my stomuch
it's been so long since i loved as i should have
sex and romance,
relationships and friends,
there's too much conflict for me to pretend
that all is well in the land of Nod.
i've too many adversaries, to go on
as i was